Ranking others inevitably leads to a loss of self-confidence. When you judge people based on a self-imposed hierarchy, you fall into a negative spiral of feeling inferior to those you deem “above” you and finding a shallow sense of relief by looking down on those “below” you.
To truly understand someone’s character, you must observe both their strengths and weaknesses from your own perspective. If you look for the good, you will inevitably find the bad. Conversely, if you judge someone solely by their flaws, you will naturally form a one-dimensional and superficial view of them.
The key is to look at both sides and, more importantly, determine how much of those flaws you can personally tolerate. If someone’s weaknesses exceed your threshold, there is no need to force a relationship. This perspective is vital because no one is without flaws.
When observing others, the most important factor is not their popularity or how they are evaluated by society. Your own standard is what matters most. After all, you are the one interacting with them, not the people who gave them those external evaluations.
Having an “internal compass” or a personal set of standards is crucial. You are the one who must make decisions regarding your own life. This is why learning—not just in academic terms, but in various forms—is so important; it strengthens your internal compass.
In theory, there should be as many sets of values as there are people. However, in collective living, these standards tend to be unified. Without a single standard, collective decision-making becomes difficult, and progress stalls. When values are unified, everyone acts the same way, causing one’s individual presence to fade.
A fading individual presence is, in essence, a lack of an internal compass. This lack means having no personal basis for judgment. It is not just about being “unique”; the real issue is how you have cultivated and formed that compass for yourself.
