I learned Hiragana and Katakana at the age of two, understanding their distinctions systematically. Even then, I was already capable of abstract thought. However, as a young child, my consciousness was often hazy. Maintaining a continuous stream of awareness was incredibly difficult; my perception was fragmentary.
One day, I was shown news of a war and told that many people were suffering far more than I was. Even then, I could not forgive that reasoning. Beyond the sheer irrationality of war, I couldn’t understand why my own suffering had to be denied in such a way.
At that young age, I was perhaps more aware of my own singularity than I am now. Why was there so much pain? Why was I being made to suffer? Why did wars even exist? I pleaded with the divine: “If you allow such things to happen, then give that position to me.”
I do not recall how I reached that conclusion. However, it has been pointed out to me that the contemplations I held back then closely resemble Indian philosophy.
Whether through that path or another, I acquired telepathic abilities. These were likely what Indian philosophy calls Siddhis, and they would go on to exert a profound influence on my life. I chose to utilize them to their fullest extent.
Within my family, I occupied the role of a scapegoat. I understood that the structure of war was identical to the structure of my family. I sought to become the scapegoat for the world. To achieve this, I intended to make the maximum use of my telepathy.
To me, this was a fantasy, and simultaneously, a secret plan. My greatest miscalculation, however, was that this plan was not merely a fantasy—it had become reality.
